Wednesday, February 21, 2007
i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.i fucking hate myself.
just wanna say it thousand times. but im too scared that my com will hang. -.-
Scuicide On a Sunny Day.
8:29 PM
Friday, February 16, 2007
喜欢是16岁时上自习课偷偷看前排那个帅气男生的发际，当他不经意扭过头的时候赶紧避开他的目光，脸却不争气的红了。
爱是他在的时候，眼睛里只有他一人；他不在的时候，一切都带有他的影子。
喜欢是在深夜看书时突然想起他，想象他现在做什么，心里漾起一阵轻飘飘的温暖，却从不主动给他打电话。几分钟后，注意力又重新被书中的情节吸引。
爱是在寂寞的夜里，思念如潮水般涌来，手里捧着书却怎么也看不进去，心里惦记着他此时是否还在加班，吃没吃晚饭，是不是如自己想着他一般想着自己。
喜欢是和他讨论问题争的面红耳赤，各不相让，在他面前像个刺猬一样从不认输，但在心里却早已暗暗佩服他的见地他的才华。
爱是希望他和自己步调一致，和自己心灵相通，他无心说的一句玩笑话也能让自己顷刻情绪低落甚至眼泪汪汪。在他面前，自己是从不设防的。
喜欢是出门在外给他发个短信，告诉他这边的天气很好，然后把手机关掉，独自在异地疯玩一个星期，晒成一个黑人后突然出现在他面前吓他一跳。
爱是无论到哪都希望有他陪伴。可以站在海边给他打手机，让他听听海浪的声音；也可以因为在异乡的街道上看到一个酷似他的背影而愣在原地久久不动。
喜欢是他出差前简单的道一声“一路平安”，看着他离去的背影，心中有一点不舍，却什么也不说，只是默默等待他归来的消息，
爱是他临出差前千叮咛万嘱咐，往他的背包里塞满衣服和食物，在车站要等到火车开走才肯离开。并且在他走后的日子里天天心神不定，一遍遍的祈祷他能够平安归来。
喜欢是在受伤的时候，不想让他看到自己脆弱的一面，在他面前把眼泪悄悄抹掉，转过头依然是一副快乐坚强的模样。
爱是在受委屈的时候，爬在他的胸前痛哭，没有伪装没有顾虑，把所有的烦恼统统告诉他，并渴望从他的怀抱中得到安慰。
喜欢是和他周末逛街逛累了一起吃肯德基；是在寒冷的冬天和他抢一杯热咖啡；是和他并肩走在街上中间始终隔着半米的距离；是陪他一起在电脑前打游戏两个人笑的像个孩
爱是周末利用半天时间亲手做出几道好菜满足的看他吃下去；是在寒冷的冬天不断为他的咖啡杯里续上热水；是和他走在街上任由他紧紧挽着自己的手；是在他旁边安静着做着，幸福地看着他在电脑前工作时专心的样子。
喜欢是听他讲自己童年的趣事，然后哈哈大笑，心中涌起一阵莫名的感动。
爱是听他将自己童年的趣事，然后微微一笑，心中更加怜惜眼前这个曾经如此调皮捣蛋的男人。
喜欢是在楼道里碰上他，愉快的和他打声招呼，再简单寒暄几句，擦肩而过的时候看见了窗外明媚的阳光，心情无端好了起来。
爱是在楼道了看见他，脸上装出一副毫不在乎的表情，但在擦肩而过时细心感受身边颤动的空气，于是忍不住回头望一眼。
喜欢是看到他和另一个女孩牵手走过，心里有一点点疼，但很快会冲着朝阳重新扬起笑脸。
爱是输不爱是输不起的游戏，付出全部只后，留下的可能仅仅是刻在心底的一道伤痕。
haiz.. if it is as said, then im starting to love you.
why is that so? i wonder.
no one would tell me.
just that everytime i miss you i know for sure that the person in your heart is not me. but her.
sigh.
just that time everytime im blaming myself for being so silly. i know that i cant withdraw myself from it.
i question myself. but i have no answer.
haiz.
i started hanging out online..doing nothing.. just to wait for you and talk with you..
sometimes angry with you for letting me wait that long..but once you are back i was always happy to see you..
why?
its like the baby monkey harlow did in his psychology research ><
im going crazy ><
Scuicide On a Sunny Day.
6:44 PM
Monday, February 12, 2007
Your IQ Is 115
|
Your Logical Intelligence is Below Average
Your Verbal Intelligence is Genius
Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius
Your General Knowledge is Above Average
|
You Are 79% Addicted to the Internet
|
In your opinion, life without the internet is hardly worth living.
Could be, but you probably need a bit more fresh air and sunshine to think clearly.
|
Your Love Style is Agape
|
You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.
Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.
You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.
Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.
For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.
|
You Are 60% Addicted to Love
|
Might as well face it, you're addicted to love.
You've been a fool for love many times - but are you the wiser for it?
Your needs should come first, both in and out of relationships.
Because you're the only one who can look out for yourself!
|
Your Personality Is
|
Idealist (NF)
You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.
You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals.
You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.
Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings.
You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.
Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships.
In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily.
At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career.
With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone.
As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style.
On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.
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Scuicide On a Sunny Day.
3:56 PM
Sunday, February 04, 2007
the next day i dint go and take straws cos i too scared ma. then one girl friend ofmine came over. and i thought she want find her other friends at my table but i dint expect her to come over and tapped on my shoulder and said: "eh. you know what? the red shirt guy likes you." im like what? -.--.--.- what?! issit the asian guy? i asked and she said YES -________________- im like omg. just ignore him k and she walked away and later on i raised my head from my psychology hw and saw his whole table looking at me -.-
when the lunch period was over; i walked towards to the door to wait for the bell to ring. and there comes the girl. and she asked me:
she: so that guy likes u!
me: -.- uh . yea.
she: do u like him??
me: -__- i dont know =x i dont even know him.
she: umm. but he likes you!
me: -.------------- uhhh. but how do YOU know that he likes me??
she: he just told his whole table that he likes you.
me: *speechless =x* uh.
and then my lovelly friend Leah Parks, called me and finally i escaped from the endless hole of questions from that girl =.=
so. i was scared. kind of. and dont know what to do between the guy i like and the guy who likes me. and so the next day i walked with sean together in the hall way and we saw him.
day1 when we saw him:
me: *pokes him* EH. thats him.
sean: who??
day II
me: there comes him again.
sean: OMG he is soooo ugly =x
day III
me and the guy saw each other and walked pass each other.
me: ha . that guy.
sean: he dint dare to look at you just now! ><
me: >< maybe hes too shy. haha.
thats all. omg i dont know whats gonna happen on mon.
btw, that guy should be a chinese cos i asked my friend who sits at that guys table and he told me his name is alan chan or alan chen or something. and that guy is damn clever because his GPA(something like average grade among all your classes; full marks is 5) is freaking high- 4.2 . which means he took advance placement classes which makes him has an GPA that >4. cos i think my GPA is like 3.8 or something but i dint take any Advanced placement classes so my GPA is kind of considered high. ha. but he is so much higher ><
=.=
rah.
im so confused now ><
<3,
anna
Scuicide On a Sunny Day.
5:08 PM
